is this my life.....?

why everything just happen so sudden...

this world have been so cruel to me...

'he' used to be call as a 'cow' in the house...

why today he will become so ill..after 50 years...

'she' used to be the super woman in my life and she seems to be like older and older in days...

'another he' used to be so closed to me..

we played...

we laugh..

we cried...

but now is like so strange to me..

i started to have a kind of feeling that i hate the one beside him...

i dont know how much can i believe in what she said...

how much she love and really care about him and his future...

my dear small little 'he'...he always the youngest in the house..

i'm so proud of you..i know you are so mature in thinking but you just did not show up...

i have been an emotional human...for such a long time...

i will not stop caring worrying all my beloved in my life...till the day i sleep and never wake....

i promise i will...

i will be strong as what i HAVE TO...

situation happening makes me grow...makes or to say FORCE me to be strong...

to all my beloved..can you all promise me to live happily and healthy...?

as it has been my birthday and new year wishes for years...

i'm freaking down now...

LAUGHTER pls come back to me and my family...

i need you now....